burping babies, the bouncer moment, and our 7 week mark.

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00JUNE2018 1-200JUNE2018 1-300JUNE2018 1we just hit the 7 week mark of our baby girls joining our family. 7 weeks out doesn’t make me an expert on the twin front by any means, if anything, it’s only made me a tired person. sometimes i meet people on the street who also have twins, a few years older than ours or fully grown, and i immediately want to ask them all the questions. “any tips?!?!” i usually start out, and then often something along the lines of, “but you’ve already got three others, you know what you’re doing!” is replied. oh what kind people to say such a sweet thing, but this feels so entirely different than my other experiences with one baby at a time and i need/want/love your knowledge!

it’s also funny how quickly you can forget things as you move through different stages of parenting. i’d like to chalk it up to being tired, but on maybe our third day at the hospital with fresh little beatrice and madalena, i realized as i was placing one of them in their hospital bassinet after a feeding that we’d accidentally skipped a step entirely in the whole newborn feeding process.  i panicked when i realized it. “JOSH!”,  i yelled over in his direction, “we forgot! we’re supposed to be burping them!” (sorry babies.) the story goes something like that more than i’m comfortable admitting. to the nurse as they first handed one over, “yes, i have done this before but remind me again, how often should they be feeding?!” to my pediatrician at each appointment, “and what should this look like” or “and when do i start this?!” “is this normal?” yet so much of this stage really is intuitive and i’ve learned over the years that the calmer i remain, the easier it feels for all of us, but i still have sheer moments of panic inside as i feel the weight and responsibility to keep these tiny humans healthy and happy and frankly, just alive.

there are times when i’m out alone with all 5 kids and i’m like, “wow. i’ve got this.” and then there are moments where i’m like, “WHAT?” it comes with the territory, the ups and downs of every moment, as we all adapt and shift within this now bigger family unit finding our new groove with our new little ones.  we’re in that super sweet spot though right now, because the newborn magic hasn’t yet worn off on the older siblings, so the amount of kisses and cuddles feel plentiful. and they seem so forgiving of the time and attention their new baby sisters seem to take up, which is so appreciated on this mama’s end. on saturday morning, josh took both our boys down the street for haircuts and after feeding the babies, i placed them on the floor in their bouncers beside the art table in the playroom where eleanor was drawing so i could hurry and shower. “if you or they need me, i’m in the bathroom.” i told her. when i came out to check on all three of them, eleanor was plopped on the floor in the middle of both bouncers. she had one hand holding a pacifier in one baby’s mouth while she was holding her chapter book in the other hand reading aloud. all this while rocking her other sister in the other bouncer by using her foot to move it up and down gently at the base. she was so calm and cool and collected as she read out loud to herself (and the babies), while comforting both her sisters at the same time. i almost died.

i like to remind myself of that moment seeing eleanor so lovingly multitasking in the moments when i’m feeling a little bit anxious about this transition and all parties involved. sure, i forgot to burp my babies those first couple days in the hospital, and sometimes feel like twins are such a different ballgame that i am nowhere near enough equipped for. and yes, we’re a big and loud family that’s pretty much winging it most days cause there’s a bountiful amount of sleep deprivation hitting the grownups in our home hard. but everyone is doing okay. everyone is taking care of one another. and there’s a lot of love to go around.  looking forward to the next 7 weeks with my davis crew. and the all the rest after that.

  1. Rachel

    LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!! I’m sure you guys are doing absolutely amazing. And just hang in there mama. You’ve got this. I definitely don’t have twins. Just 2 littles of my own. But just cherish every moment. I know you know this. They grow so, so fast. My youngest is 1 year and I can’t believe we’re already to that milestone. I’m like, WHERE DID A YEAR GO?!?!?!

  2. Hannah

    I love the photos of them holding hands! Well done super mama for making 7 weeks! I’m due next month, love reading your experience.

    http://www.chausadventure.com

  3. Connie

    Eleanor. I just died.

    your kids fight and cry and scream sometimes too right? or am i doing everything wrong over here?

  4. Emily

    I’m pregnant with my second and I’m already feeling this! I can’t imagine what it’s going to be like when I’m actually back on the saddle! 😂 I also can’t remember where I got any of the cute clothes of soft jammies the first time around! Would you mind mentioning where their jammies and bow’s are from? I feel like it’s so easy to go overboard with foofy and pink for girls, but I love your simple style! Thanks!!

  5. I

    Loved reading this. You rock, mama! You all rock! Your Eleanor is amazing!
    And we’ll recover from the sleep deprivation when our kids will be studying and we’ll be missing those sweet days when we were soooo tired.
    💕

  6. Kayla

    Ohhh Eleanor! That’s so precious. I loved getting a peek into your heart hear 7 weeks after your twins. Thanks for sharing! I have a twin sister, but as I didn’t raise us…I don’t have any tips. I have three older siblings as well, but growing up with my twin sister is one of the most special things ever. There were certainly some angsty years between us, but she’s been the biggest most special gift in my whole life. I love having her as my literal other half. Your girls are lucky to have each other!

  7. Abbey

    I have 3.5 year old twins (and a just 6 year old) and I honestly have no wisdom! You just hang on tight, do your best, and revel in the magic of their relationship. My twins. Also two two-year-olds and older is honestly easier than one. My 6 year old never played by herself much or for long but the twins since they were two will go off and play in their on world with their own weird games and words forever. So there’s that to look forward to :)

  8. Jessa

    Love the sweet pictures of your baby girls. I always enjoy seeing pictures of your family and the fun times that you guys have :) Hoping you get some sleep soon!

  9. Jennie

    Eleanor taking on mommy duty. Oh. My. Heart. I quite literally cried there and gained hope that I can one day do more too, and my kids will handle it. I get so scared to change the dynamic we already have and the balance we have finally achieved. I have mom fails ALL THE TIME. And I’m pretty sure my kids will likely hate me when they look back and see them all. But hopefully they see I was trying my best.

  10. Jen Allen

    It is so heart warming to read this! As a first time mom I find great comfort in these words. Thank you for sharing!

  11. What a beautiful post. I am not yet a mother, but reading this blog makes me feel so energized and confident. You and your family inspire me every time I read.

  12. Rachael

    Oh! What a fabulous older sister story! You know she learned that calm demeaneor from someone.. ;) You are doing a fantastic job Mama and your littles are beautiful evidence of that! <3

  13. So blessed so sweet and the time is
    going super fast. Keep getting those precious
    moments

  14. I’m currently in the middle of Target reading this and grinning ear to ear the story about E is so sweet! Thank you Naomi for sharing such candid moments of your family with us :)

  15. maren

    The scene you described with your 3 girls made me teary. What a beautiful moment to witness as a mother. There is nothing in this world-as a mother-that makes me happier than seeing my children love each other.

  16. Kellie

    Go Naomi you’re doing great! I’ve been a longtime reader for a decade and sometimes I feel like your little family is an extension of my little family too! I remember when you brought Eleanor home from the hospital, so to see her caring for her new sisters is truly special :)

  17. Maria Vaccaro

    It will be hard until they are at least three. Once they start moving it’s hard to keep up. Yes you have amazing help but twins as you said it’s wgole different game ❤️❤️

  18. Cassandra

    I’m so with you! I have twin 11 month olds and every time I meet someone with twins, I practically latch myself to them, asking, “How? When? Help?” Their advice is always so welcome and encouraging. I’m so very new to being a mama of two bèbès but here is what has made my husband and I shout huzzah! throughout these past 11 months, and I hope it’s helpful and encouraging to you too. First, we pray together and with our babies. HIS grace covers our fears and anxieties and exhaustion so quickly. Second, we truly believe that when in doubt, follow our guts and hearts. The natural parenting instinct is for real! Third, we stick to the joint feeding and sleeping schedules as much as possible. For a very spontaneous couple, surprisingly the “knowing” in the midst of all the unknowing is so comforting! Fourth, we try to treat each of the bèbès as individuals and try really hard to not compare. We tend to not refer to them as “the twins”, or dress them the same, and when it comes to reaching their milestones, we say “each in their own time.” Fifth, our motto for both the tough times and the exciting times is “It’s all temporary.” This always seems to calm us when we’re on the verge of being overwhelmed, and slows us down to really cherish those exciting moments before they pass too quickly by. Sixth, we are fortunate to have my parents in town and they take care of the bèbès each Sunday night, which allows us to go on dates, catch up on sleep, and check off items on our Honey Do Lists. Life and conversations can feel very “Stop Start” with multiples, so setting aside intentional time for one another without the bèbès has been replenishing for us. Lastly, it really does get easier and more fun! The first time they interact with one another, and make each other laugh, and hold each other’s hands, and comfort one another… GLORY.

  19. Barbara

    What a sweet and capable big sis!!

  20. Eleanor is such a great big sister! And you are doing so well! And your whole family is so loving, and that’s all we ever need <3

  21. Gabriella

    Loved this post! You’re doing amazingly, Naomi! And that bouncer story – heart-melting! It’s such a joy seeing your family evolve and grow into the beautiful bunch you are over the years! x

  22. Alida

    That is so sweet Naomi. I would love to see maybe a video of people’s reaction when the see you guys on the street. I’m sure there’s a lot of gushing!

  23. Rachel

    I’m tearing up at my desk reading the part about Eleanor. I am gearing up to start trying for my third and stories like that about the big sibs taking care of the little sibs makes the prospect of three feel a little less scary. Just what I needed today. Thanks! And you are AMAZING for getting out with all 5. I feel like I seriously struggle getting two littles out the door.

  24. Maria

    Well, just stay calm no matter what. Even if you do your best someone will be crying because she will be hungry, or wet, or whatever… and she will have to wait because mommy is busy with her sister. Don’t worry, stay calm and do your thing… Babies cry and its OK. And try to keep a consistent schedule, it helps a lot.

  25. Jenni Lark

    My older boys were 2-years-old and 3-years-old when my boy/girl twins were born. It was an unimaginable workload (as you’re experiencing now), so much so that my husband left. My one regret as a single-mother of four babies is the one thing you are doing beautifully now: documenting the journey. I was always so exhausted and in survival mode in my 20s that I don’t remember much now that I’m in my 30s. You will feel so grateful that you have these posts to read and reread.

    I watched one of your parenting videos in which you told your husband that you love parenting with him. It touched my heart. What a great team you two make.

  26. Elaine

    This is beautiful. I am so proud of Eleanor. What amazing parents she has to bring up a child like this. But I want to see pictures or a video. It is really special!

  27. Jess.

    I know (I super know) that there’s plenty of sleep deprivation to explain little moments of forgetfulness, but you may also want to have your Vitamin D levels checked.

    One day, after I had dropped my kids off at school, a tourist asked me the name of the street we were on. I totally blanked. (Um, it was Central Park West, and my kids have been in school on that little-known street for a long time.)

    I was so relieved to learn from my Dr. soon thereafter that my Vit. D levels were extremely low and one symptom is feeling like you’re losing your mind. I got my levels back up, and it was like flipping a switch!

    Anyway, the babies are perfect and that story about Eleanor tending to them while you were showering made me a little teary-eyed. superXOX

  28. Becka

    The bouncer seat moment just made my tear up. how sweet.

  29. Annie

    Your family is lovely and you seem like you are doing a really great job – especially so early on! :)

    I have twin boys who will turn 3 in about a month. The beginning is intense and you really learn what you – and your body – are capable of getting through! Here are some things I’ve learned along the way (along with my amazing husband, who is a stay-at-home Dad).

    It can be hard getting to know both babies at the same time. In the beginning I was always panicked if I felt like I was bonding more with one than the other. Having two new babies at one time is a big adjustment (not to mention coming off of all those hormones from pregnancy). When I finally decided to just give myself a break and go with the flow, I found that this was just a part of twin parenting.

    I have yet to meet a twin family that does not feel like Baby A acts like an older sibling. Its just a funny quirk. I’m so curious to finally meet the twins where Baby B acts like the older sibling!

    You can really stress yourself out by comparing their progress on milestones. What took me some time to see was that they would kind of give the other space to get through a milestone before doing it themselves. They both still do this for each other all the time. They may also do things a bit later, like talking, since they are so content with each other.

    The twin bond is a truly amazing thing to witness. There is an unspoken communication that happens that can be breathtaking. I have a feeling that there’s going to be some real deal mischief in my future since they can get on each other’s wavelength without saying anything out loud. The teen years will be interesting, I’m sure :)

    Since they so often think alike, they will often want the same things or have the same ideas. This can be frustrating for them so we try to separate them on the weekends to give them space to do their own things. It doesn’t happen all the time, but one of us will take one to the grocery store while the other goes to the park with the other parent. They LOVE that special one-on-one time.

    This is an odd one, but I think it is worth mentioning since I wish someone had told me. When the boys were born, they each favored leaning their heads to one particular side. Since they were more calm if they could see each other, we usually laid them down so they could cuddle and cozy up (kind of like in that sweet picture of your girls at the top of this post). We ended up with some issues with neck strength and head shape which required physical therapy and those little corrective helmets. It wasn’t the end of the world, but the physical therapist told us that we should lay them down so that they have to move their heads in the direction they *don’t* favor so that their muscles would stay loose and lengthen in the right way. This by no means happens to everyone, and I hesitate to even write something that could end up worrying you. Your girls are just young enough that if you are aware of it or notice any signs you won’t have to deal with any of it!

    You’ll be great! Twin parents are busy folks but we are definitely a community of people who cheer each other on!

  30. Zsuzsanna

    Yay,so it is not just me who also completely forgot to burp my second baby in the first two days in the hospital, The nurse had to remind me after Aiden was crying and I had no idea what was wrong. I agree, does not matter how many children you already have, with a new baby you have to learn almost everything from scratch:))
    Your family is simple beautiful!!

  31. Vicky

    Ok – pretty sure it’s more than my own pregnancy hormones but the little story of Eleanor just totally tending to the babies made my tear up. What a fantastic big sister she is! I love these stories and look so forward to many more just like this one. You have a wonderful family!

  32. Jenni

    This is such a beautiful post. I am the oldest of 7 and was always taking care of my siblings when my mom needed to take a shower or if she dozed off in the middle of reading us a book. Now days, with work or whatever, when something needs to get done fast, with multiple moving parts and I make it happen, people are always like “how?” and I respond “I’m the oldest of a huge family.” Literally, where I learned everything! haha. Thanks for the lovely post and walking me down memory lane.

  33. Karen

    I’m 14 weeks pregnant with number 3 (!) and that moment you told of Eleanor taking care of her sisters while reading to her self has brought tears to my eyes!! My two girls will be 8 and 4 when this baby arrives and no doubt they will be my happy little helpers too – they can’t wait for our baby to be here already!

  34. My twins are 10. It gets SO MUCH EASIER! (Now they vacuum the living room, clean the toilets and unload the dishwasher! It’s the best!)
    You had twins the hard way, in my opinion. Starting with singletons and then having twins has to be so hard. I had my twins first, so I didn’t know any different. (Plus I had youth on my side!) Then I followed up with two singletons and was like, “What?!? One baby? This is so easy!” haha!

    You’re doing great, and I promise it only gets better from here. The first six weeks are the hardest.

    Your babies are beautiful and I am really enjoying reminiscing this time via your blog!!!