hi there! i hope you had a great week and are about to have an even better weekend. i’m sure crossing my fingers for one. to be honest, the last few days have been on the rougher side for me. i haven’t been sleeping well at night, and that in and of itself is a large part. but also because i have been allowing feelings of inadequacy to creep into my life. there is always room for bettering oneself, but i feel like sometimes i am barely keeping up with my day to day to even get to that list of things to improve. you know? “survival” mode. sometimes i swear i just can’t even get out of survival mode!
i want to be the best wife and mother and friend and sister and daughter that i am capable of being. i want to take proper care of myself and my family. i want to have a home that has a spirit and energy of love and peace. one that is on the cleaner side (not crazy clean- but beds made, no cheerios on the floor kind of clean. baby steps.) i want time to finish projects that i have started that are important to me. i want to find more time for service, less time getting caught up in stupid drama that seriously should not even be going on. i want to read more parenting books. i want to finish the parenting books i started over a year ago. i don’t want to let stupid little things that i have no control over get under my skin. i don’t want to let things go bad in my fridge. i want to exercise more. i want to use that juicer we invested in weeks ago and still haven’t used. i want to listen to my girlfriends and compliment them more. i want to never lose my keys again (they are lost somewhere in the apartment right now. of course. me and those freaking keys, man!)
i’m trying to make changes so i can be and do these things. little changes, nothing big yet. i don’t want to set myself up for complete failure. ;) little things like straightening up the house before we leave each morning so we come home to a clean one. or setting aside an hour each saturday morning to just read my parenting books. or only go grocery shopping with a list and meal plan in mind so nothing goes bad in my fridge. or look for the positive things in friends and others and verbalize it to them rather than just think it. little steps…but we’ll get there. i’m planning to check in with myself each sunday night through the remainder of the year and see where i thrived and what needs more work each week. life is too short to let some silly feelings of inadequacy take over.
so this is where i’m at. coming to realizations, making changes, trying to live life better. please wish me luck. i wish you luck, too! support! we all need more of that, don’t we? here we go. have a great one!