eleanor, mama, and a baby bump named ‘boy’.

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my dear friend carissa takes the most special photographs. she snapped these of eleanor and me and my baby bump the other week in the park and i just love them so.
i love eleanor very much. looking through these photos gave me that overwhelming feeling i often get of just how special she really is. and of the energy and love she can bring into a room at just 14 months old.
this sweet little girl- she is mine. mine. that little girl in the red sandals who has entered toddler-hood with the most contagious giggle but also with a touch of sass, she is mine. that little girl with 7 tiny teeth who tries to breast-feed her panda bear and battles me on eating her greens every.single.day… she is mine. that sweet spirit who is so observant at just 14 months and wants to mimic every little thing that i do (oh how she can keep me in line!)… who makes me want to be a better person, better wife, and better mother every day. she is mine. it’s so wonderful to think about, and so overwhelming at the same time. what a large responsibility we as mothers have on our shoulders… caring for these beautiful children who come to us with such innocent spirits and endless potential. who will grow up and can change the world for the better. gosh how unworthy i feel for the task. and how mortifying it can be to really think about sometimes… you know?
i remember sitting on the bathroom floor with eleanor on my lap last september while i waited for the results of my pregnancy test to show up on that little stick. i remember feeling complete shock and joy when the test read “pregnant” but at the same time experiencing this teeny tiny hint of “wait….not yet…” too. not yet, because expecting another baby meant there was a deadline on this special time of just me and eleanor and, of course, her papa. i was, and still am, loving (almost) every minute of this time as just us. and while josh and i had discussed for a long time that we were ready to get pregnant again, in that moment, i didn’t know if selfishly i’d be willing to welcome another baby into the world when life with eleanor and her papa was just: so good.
after the bathroom incident, eleanor and i drove over to josh’s office as fast as i could buckle her into that carseat and hit the gas pedal to share the news. he came out to the car to meet us. the second he sat down in the passenger seat i handed him my pregnancy test and tried not to blink so i could study his face to see where he stood. it didn’t take but 2 seconds for him to burst into some of the most joyous tears i’ve seen from him as he pulled me into his arms and hugged and kissed me, over and over. that was all i needed to know that everything would be ok. that having a deadline on our time as a family of three wasn’t so terrible. and that a family of four would be even better.
there are moments when i still wonder how i will ever love another baby the way love eleanor. but deep down, i know it will happen. just like the way I didn’t know i had this deep and profound capacity to love eleanor until she was placed in my arms. i remember looking at her little pink face for the first time and feeling this new love rush in from who knows where. but it was there. it’s still here. growing and growing by leaps and bounds every day. i’m thankful for my time with her over the past 14 months. when i think of her taking on the role of “big sister” soon, i get so excited. being her mama has been the sweetest experience. i really love it. and i love her so.
ps. there are a few more photos on carissa’s blog as well as her portfolio from this day together if you’d like to see.
  1. These pictures are absolutely beautiful!!

  2. love that y'all allow us into your very special journey… it is such an encouragement :)

  3. Hannah

    The way you speak about her almost brought a tear to my eye. Such an adorable family :)

  4. These photos are gorgeous! Your little Eleanor is so sweet. Thank you for sharing this with your readers. It is exactly what I needed to hear. You are an amazing woman! Xo

  5. Lara

    You made me very happy and very sad at the same time. My precious Valeria tuned one year this Sunday and I fell as totaly mine all you say about your feelings for Ms E. And I understand you so well for as much as I would love to have another baby I don t know if i cand "produce" as muuch love for him/her as i feel right now for V. But I know that God help us always, with everything, much more when it comes about our children. be blessed the four of you, hugs&kisses; from Bucharest, L

  6. I honest its very beautiful photos. Thanks for sharing this post with us. I really wait for your new baby by. You have done great work.

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  7. Sari

    Your writing about your family brings me to tears. So beautiful. I hope I would feel that way one day when I have a family..


  8. This post is beautiful and absolutely resonates with me, as I daydream about my 15 month old (who shines like your eleanor) and my 13 week old baby growing inside of me. It is bitter sweet that the "so good" time with "just us" is coming to an end. But thrilling that our hearts will swell with that much more love the second time around.

  9. Beautiful post!
    You both look so cute together :)

  10. so true and so honest and i completely agree… I'm definitely sure you will be a perfect mother of two wonderful kids!!!!

  11. Kate

    Love this! I'm right there with you. My SIL told me something that quieted my heart a little at having enough love for another child, though: Love is like a faucet. It can fill any cup – any need – that comes to it, and there's an infinite amount that it can fill. It doesn't have to be stingy or withhold to make sure everyone gets the same amount. It's always ready for the need.

  12. Beautiful pictures and post!!! :)

  13. Mandee

    you have mermaid hair

  14. Jessica

    Lovely post. I know those feelings. Sometimes you think your heart my burst with Love.

  15. What a gorgeous post! Not only are the photos beautiful but what you wrote was as well!

  16. Sarah

    So sweet:-) And love the beautiful pictures.

  17. She is so cute, I can see why your'e so smitten! You're a very lucky lady, and so is she for having you x

  18. Louise

    This pictures are so so so cute:) i think elenor is such a beautiful, sweet little girl and her laugh is contagious- anyway, it's so amazing how often she laughs. She always looks like the happiest girl in the world.

  19. Johanna

    These pictures are soooo beautiful! I especially like the bottom one, you guys are so cute!

  20. Klér

    nice photos <3

  21. such a beautiful, well written post.

  22. Im in bits over here! thats all. xxxx

  23. So pretty.. i love you two with the flowers in your hair. And congratulations on the boy to be :)

  24. naomi, this is so beautiful and genuine. you are a good mama full of so much love.

  25. Love is something that multiplies when it is divided.


  26. Lily

    These pictures are amazing — I love the flower crowns!

    BTW, you have the cutest round bump :)

  27. I just love these so much! so much.


  28. this is so well written Naomi. i had the same fears when i found out i was pregnant with my second. i wondered how i could possibly have enough love for both children. i thought that my heart was full loving my first and my husband. boy, was i wrong. it's amazing how the heart can expand. now i have three and my heart fills with love everyday. equal love for each of my amazing children.

    i wish you the best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy!

  29. Davina

    thanks for sharing your story and insight on motherhood, it is very encouraging to read!! : )

  30. Liesl

    GORGEOUS all around!!! <3 <3 <3

  31. becca

    what an incredible post. I love the photos all alone, but your words are so comforting.
    thank you.

  32. Emily

    These pictures are breathtaking.

  33. I always say this but your blog is so inspirational and it makes me so happy to read it each and every time!

  34. I always say this but your blog is so inspirational and it makes me so happy to read it each and every time!

  35. L.E.M.

    this post is so touching. and so #fluff. I lovee everything fluff. I am not yet a mother but I cannot wait to be one! this post is everything. you have such a beautiful family and i just want to thank you for sharing it with the world :)

  36. Jill

    We are very similar to your story. We have a little boy and we're expecting our little girl this August. Our children will be 14 months apart and while it's bittersweet, it's going to be awesome!

    Congrats on your little boy. He will melt your heart, for sure!

  37. Love the honesty… I often wonder how I will be able to love another little one as much as the first. You know the love will be there, but can't help but be nervous :)

  38. Lisa

    You have the most adorable & smiley baby ever. I just love it! :)

  39. i love these pictures! so insanely sweet! where did you get your flower crowns? :)

  40. Nicole

    Your words are perfect, thanks for sharing with us all your thoughts.

    Lovely Idea

  41. Jessi

    Please, please please tell me where that dress is from! It looks so comfy and flattering and you look beautiful in it!

  42. Jessi

    Please, please please tell me where that dress is from! It looks so comfy and flattering and you look beautiful in it!

  43. made me thrill! congratulations mommy!!

  44. Dayah

    Hi Taza,

    I just found you lovely blog!
    So in love with all the story and picture of your lovely family..

    I'm so touch reading about your moment telling husband bout pregnancy, wow touch me indeed. I hope one day I can have 1 little family like u.